Chris Titus Debloat Windows 11 Upd May 2026

Chris didn't believe in manual clicking. Manual clicking was for mortals and masochists. He opened PowerShell as Administrator—the true altar of system control—and pasted the first sacred incantation:

The woman at the end of the support line sounded desperate. "It takes forty-five seconds to open a PDF," she whispered, as if her laptop might hear her and slow down even more. "The Start menu recommends candy crushes. I have never played a candy crush."

Chris Titus smiled. "It's not a curse. It's just capitalism. And we just voted with a script." chris titus debloat windows 11

Chris Titus leaned back in his chair, the glow of three monitors washing over his ever-present hoodie. He’d heard this before. A thousand times before. Windows 11 had become a digital mall: flashy storefronts, unwanted kiosks, and background processes hawking weather reports, news alerts, and "suggested" icons for apps that didn’t exist yet.

"Don't be scared," he said. "We're not deleting your files. We're deleting Microsoft's ideas about your files." Chris didn't believe in manual clicking

She hesitated. "But Edge is the browser."

"Gone."

"No," Chris corrected. "It became a magnifying glass icon . That's what we call 'respecting your screen real estate.'"