The Day My Sister And I Turned Into Wild Beasts Fixed -
When I stood up, my knees were stained brown, my hair was a nest of twigs, and my cheeks were wet with tears I hadn’t felt fall. I looked at my sister. She was standing on a rocky outcropping, chest heaving, a feral grin splitting her face.
My beast was not the wolf. Mine was the badger: low to the ground, stubborn, equipped with claws designed for digging in and refusing to let go. I had spent eighteen years being the peacekeeper, the emotional sponge, the one who smoothed every ruffled feather. That day, I grew a hide of pure, impenetrable rage. Not the explosive kind, but the slow, tectonic kind that reshapes continents.
That was the moment her spine unspooled. I watched, in awe and terror, as the girl who had spent a lifetime apologizing for taking up space suddenly occupied all of it. Her shoulders widened. Her jaw unclenched. Her eyes, usually averted, became amber coals. She was no longer Elara, the diligent daughter. She was a wolf who had remembered she had a pack of one. the day my sister and i turned into wild beasts
We did not turn back into humans that night. We have never fully turned back. We go to work, we pay bills, we attend baby showers and funerals. We smile and shake hands and say “please” and “thank you.” But beneath our skin, the beasts are always awake. Elara’s wolf paces the perimeter of every boardroom, every passive-aggressive text message, every time someone tells her to calm down. My badger curls in the hollow of my chest, claws extended, ready to tear through anyone who mistakes my kindness for weakness.
The inciting incident was mundane, as these things often are. A family dinner. A passing comment from our uncle about Elara’s “aggressive” career ambitions. A muttered observation from our grandmother about the “shame” of my weight gain. Small cuts. Paper cuts. A thousand of them, on the same old scar tissue. But on that day, the salt was too sharp. The silence after the comments stretched like a tendon about to snap. When I stood up, my knees were stained
Let the world beware. The wild is not a place. It is a decision. And we have made it.
I knelt in the dirt. I pressed my palms into the earth and felt the cool grit under my fingernails. I dug. Not to bury anything, but to anchor myself to something true. The beast in me didn’t need to chase. It needed to root. I pulled up handfuls of wild grass and let the blades cut my skin. The pain was a revelation. It was mine. My beast was not the wolf
We drove to the edge of town, where the suburbs give way to scrubland and the sky opens up like a second chance. We got out of the car. The sun was setting, bleeding orange and violet across the horizon. Elara took off her shoes. I took off my cardigan—the beige one, the “safe” one, the one that made me look harmless.