If you know, you know. If you don’t—strap in.
Zern draws the juice as a color that shouldn’t exist (a sort of vibrating brown-yellow-green). The grandson’s face, panel by panel, melts like a Salvador Dalí clock. The final panel is just text: “It tasted like the color of a lie.”
Tom Zern isn’t a household name. He’s more like that fever dream you had after eating expired cheese at 2 AM. For decades, Zern has lurked in the grimy corners of alt-weeklies, mini-comics, and punk zines, drawing stuff that makes The Far Side look like a Hallmark card. We’re talking comics that are —not in a "cool" 90s way, but in a deeply, gloriously, physically wrong way. zerns sickest comics
Zern draws the condensation on the bun. The priest’s tiny vestment is stretched over the meat. In panel four, a parishioner whispers, “Forgive me, Father, for I have… relish.” The priest just oozes mustard. It’s sacrilegious, sweaty, and makes you nauseous for reasons you can’t explain. Sick rating: 🤢🤢🤢🤢 2. “Nose Bones” (2001) Premise: A man discovers that his nose contains a tiny, fragile skeleton. He becomes obsessed with showing it to people.
Here’s our breakdown of Zern’s sickest work to date. Viewer discretion is advised (and encouraged). Premise: A Catholic priest turns into a sentient, leaking hot dog during Sunday mass. He still has to hear confessions. If you know, you know
Zern draws Uncle Smiles with human teeth and deflated, veiny scrotum-texture. In one panel, Uncle Smiles eats a corn dog through his ear . The final strip shows him floating away while whispering, “You didn’t want the stuffed giraffe anyway.” It’s surreal, predatory, and deeply unsettling. 4. “The Worm Who Signed a Lease” (2010) Premise: A sentient, necktie-wearing worm signs a 12-month lease on a studio apartment. He cannot operate the stove.
This comic was rejected by three alt-weeklies for being “too much.” It’s Zern at his peak—body horror, family trauma, and a punchline that leaves you hollow. Tom Zern’s comics aren’t for everyone. They’re for the sickos. The people who laugh when a cartoon foot turns into a mushroom. The ones who appreciate that a drawing of a sad, leaking hot dog can be funnier than any three-panel sitcom strip. The grandson’s face, panel by panel, melts like
And we’re grateful for every chunky, unsettling, brilliant drop.